Sunday, October 14, 2012

For Your Eyes Only

"The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame" - Genesis 2:25

A while ago this was part of a reading in chapel, and it really struck me for the first time. Usually when this passage is read I'm so preoccupied thinking about how wonderful it is that men and women are the same flesh and thinking about how this is the first marriage and it's so pure and beautiful. But think about this line with me for a second. The Bible (this is God's holy Word) just straight up tells you that these two people are naked. And shameless. Not embarrassed at all. Or insecure. Or even a little scared.
What happened to that?
Obviously the next chapter talks about their fall into sin, but did that have to completely ruin everything? We still get married, become a new family, and join our flesh to create children. The feeling of freedom is gone though. When did we start to feel shame about one of God's greatest gifts? Christian friends, I've come to the time when my blog talks about sex. Because as much as we'd like to make it taboo and shameful, it's not. The intimate physical love shared between two married people is an awesome blessing! But, like most things in this world, it was cast into a shadow when we fell into sin.
Ever since I had that "Wow" moment about this verse, I've been considering why we feel so shameful about sex. Mostly I've decided the problem is that our culture is so saturated with sexual immorality. Sex within the context of marriage is totally great, but when do we ever talk about that? We see movies that feature short-lived, passionate (and often secret) sexual encounters, creating a "cloak and dagger" attitude about the act. We read magazines that tell us how to "amaze your partner in bed" right next to horror stories about nasty breakups. The hurt and damage that comes from inappropriate sex isn't just in fiction though. So many times I've seen friends hurt because they "gave all they had" to someone they were dating and it didn't work out.  
What I find most detestable about our culture these days is the general availability and acceptability of pornography and sexual images. I have several close friends with deep emotional scars from a porn addiction earlier in life. It's a struggle for them every day to overcome temptation. It affects their relationships. In a world where almost everyone by the age of 16 (or even younger) has seen sex acted out "perfectly" on a screen, how are we supposed to feel confident in our own sexual encounters? How could we possibly feel completely secure about our own bodies when we know our partner has seen other bodies more attractive than ours? It breaks my heart that, in an act that should allow two people who are committed in love to enjoy each other without shame, we are fighting insecurity and anxiety simply because we live in a sinful and impatient world. 
The temptation we face as Christians who save sexuality for marriage makes for a difficult transition once the condition of marriage is reached. A friend who is getting married soon was talking with me, and saying how weird it's going to be on the night of her wedding. She remarked, "We've gone through all these years of dating with the attitude that sex is completely out of the question, and then in one afternoon suddenly it's going to be okay." My prayer is that when I'm dating my future spouse, we can have a healthy respect and for the gift of sex and an understanding of purity with each other. I've learned some hard lessons about giving an inch and taking a mile. It will be hard to resist temptation, and we will probably have to resort to associating shame with the action itself and then overcoming that attitude once we're married. 
I guess the point of all this is to encourage you to remember that sex is indeed a wonderful gift. We abuse it, and the abuses make the gift harder to enjoy. But if we save that gift for it's rightful place, we will never have to feel shame. We can simply delight in being one flesh, and know that we are sharing a unique and new experience together with the one person we love most. Even though we want things to happen on our own time, God's way is always the most joyful in the end.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Bloom where you're planted.

It's possible that if I post over the next couple months it will be prompted by a Bible study I'm going through right now centered around Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, A Time for Everything. 
This week the pair that we looked at was in Verse 2: "a time to plant and a time to uproot". That idea is completely relevant in my life right now. I think I've said before how much is changing for me. Nothing seems constant, and it's sometimes really hard to figure out which changes are from God, and which come from the selfishness of man. Then if I do believe that God is working a change I have to set about accepting it. Sometimes I mess up and start something that isn't in God's plan. In this case we have the assurance from Matthew 15:13, "Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by the roots." Often our new endeavours don't work out for a very good reason. It can be hard to remember that God has a hand in all that we do. He hinders that which would harm us, and aids the things that enrich our lives, all according to his plan. David writes in Psalm 1:3 that the man who is in God's keeping "is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers." I don't know about you, but I often wish that God would give me a sign that I'm on the right track. Here's the surprise - He does that for us every day! Every time that we experience contentment and a smooth road to success, God is telling us that we are on the right track. His plans never fail, and only receive opposition from the attacks of Satan. 

Okay, so God plants us where he wants us to be and waters us with his blessings, but what about when we have problems? What happens when sin comes in and stunts our growth? We live in the midst of sin every minute of every day; sin that diseases us and withers our spirit. Things in our lives that deserve hard work and dedication are left for dead. But there is still hope for the gifts from God that we think are damaged beyond help. 
The parable of Luke 13:6-9 goes like this: "A man had a fig tree, planted in his vineyard, and he went to look for fruit on it, but did not find any. So he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, 'For three years now I've been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and haven't found any. Cut it down! Why should it use up the soil?' 'Sir,' the man replied, 'leave it alone for one more year, and I'll dig around it and fertilize it. If it bears fruit next year, fine! If not, then cut it down." Maybe it seems like a lot of work, but we can never know what blessings may come to us if we wait just a little while before we give up on something or someone. Maybe it's a relationship that you thought was dead. Or an activity that's simply too much effort. It could be a forgotten blessing. Look for ways to work on it, and see what good things may follow.

Obviously I have quite a bit to say about the subject of planting and fertilizing the proverbial gardens of our lives. But what is really hitting home (literally) for me at this moment is the idea of uprooting. What happens when it's time for something to end? Possibly that's a relief. But I'm inclined to believe that the mysterious writer of Ecclesiastes is speaking more about the aspects of our lives that we would really prefer not to let go of. Some of them are poisonous and harmful, and we hold onto them stubbornly believing that they're good for us. Yet sometimes it's simply time for a good thing to be done, so that another good thing can begin. 
For the last 9 years of my life my home has been in Southern Illinois. I grew up in a small town from 6th grade until now. I have friends and mentors there that have shaped the person I am today. Yes, I'm happy at college, but that was the place that my heart called home. My father has taken a new job. While I continue on here in Wisconsin, my parents are packing up everything I've known and finding a house in Saint Louis. I'm too far away to help them move, and I'll have one final weekend to say my goodbyes to my hometown. My dad will no longer be my pastor. We can't even keep our cat. The uprooting of my earthly home has drawn my attention to how attached I am to earthly things. It's a natural human reaction, but it seems silly. My car wreck last year should have taught me that nothing is certain. I've always been slow to learn lessons like that though. 
What I need to remember is that my true home is always with my Savior Jesus. He is working wonderful things for me and my family, and this job will be a tremendous blessing. He is with me everywhere I am, no matter what I do, and when all that I am here on earth passes away, he will be waiting for me in my eternal home. What a beautiful assurance.


Monday, August 20, 2012

Go With the Flow

"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." ~ Proverbs 19:21

We love to make plans, don't we? It's nice to feel like we know where we're going in life. We go to school, invest money, buy houses, and search for companions - all to secure our future. Most of us spend our lives dreaming of the "next big thing". It can be so exciting to think about how much better life will be in the future.
The truth we'd rather not face is that nothing is ever certain aside from God's love for us. It's good to have goals rather than living aimlessly, but our goals are by no means guaranteed. This has been a year of changes in my life. I got a new job, and have moved around to various homes (with various roommates). I left a long-term relationship. I changed my college major. People have entered and left my life. I even chopped off all my hair and started a weight loss program. Right now I feel like a completely different person than I was even 3 months ago. Some of the changes have been great. Some have been really hard. Sometimes it's been hard to know what to feel. Through it all I've been tempted to be upset. So much change is enough to make anyone worry what the next overhaul will be. As always though, the only comfort for times like these comes from Jesus. He says in Matthew 6:25 and 27, "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?...Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"
God provides for us in so many ways, even when it seems like the important things in our lives are falling apart. We still have life and love. Better still, we have assurance of eternal happiness through Jesus. That will never change. Take a moment to cherish the smaller joys in life, and you'll find that your heart feels lighter. As they used to say on VeggieTales, "A thankful heart is a happy heart."

   

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Ready and Willing

There are some days when I just feel terrified. The world can seem so bleak. Today is one of those days. I'm afraid, because I feel like I'm living in a society bound for failure.
A couple nights ago I was watching Star Trek: The Next Generation (one of my favorite shows). One of the adventures of the episode was that the crew found an "ancient" satellite floating through space with three cryogenically frozen people on board. When the three people were thawed, it was discovered that they were from the late 20th century. After listening to them carry on about their lost lives and possessions for a while, Commander Riker says, "It's a wonder our race survived past the 21st century."
Unfortunately sometimes I think the same thing. It seems that everyone (myself included) is often selfish and apathetic. We only do things that benefit ourselves in some way. We think that someone else will take care of the things that are distasteful. Our society has trained us in making excellent excuses, so that even we ourselves are fooled into thinking that "We just can't do it." 
However severe the issue is today, apathy is not a new problem. Maybe times in the Bible the people that God chooses to do his work are fearful and unwilling. Think of Moses. God came to him in his exile and chose him to be the one to free his people from slavery. But he was afraid and doubted himself. In Exodus 3 and 4, as he is conversing with God, Moses argues, "Who am I to bring the Israelites out of Egypt?", and "What if they do not believe me?", and "I am slow of speech and tongue." All of these are questions we might ask when God is calling us. But God always provides the means to accomplish his will. In Exodus 4:11-12 God says to Moses, "Who gave man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or mute? Who gives him sight or makes him blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say."
How can we be afraid to fail when God has equipped us for success? When God calls us to do his will, whether the task is daunting or seemingly insignificant, we can be confident and gladly answer, as in Isaiah 6:8, "Here am I. Send me!"

 

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Grace

(n) 1 : Unmerited help given to people by God; 2 : A temporary respite (as from a debt)

There are many more definitions of "grace" in the dictionary, but these are the two that most pertain to this particular topic of interest. Grace is a wonderful thing to receive and a difficult thing to give. 
There's a phrase that my mother uses sometimes to describe people: EGR - Extra Grace Required. We all have people that fit this description in our lives. The person dating someone we used to be with. The elderly woman at church who never seems to have anything interesting to say. The teacher who always has something critical to say. The friend who takes us for granted. All of these people drain our positive energy and leave us short tempered. It's hard not to wonder why we even bother dealing with them. Unfortunately we can't always see the effect we have on someone's life. You never know if you are the only person (or one of the few) who actually shows kindness to one of those difficult people. 
As Christians we have a duty to show grace to those who are difficult to love. Indeed it may be difficult, but if we can't do it, who can? We have the ultimate example of grace and love. 1 John 3:16-18 says, "This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him , how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." Our compulsion to grace and love goes beyond filling physical needs. We also are called to fill the emotional needs of those around us, showing them kindness despite the difficulty. 
Christ showed us the ultimate kindness when he died on the cross for our sins. Although we may not like to admit it, in God's eyes we are all cases of "extra grace required". We're not just a little bit sinful. Everyone at some point has strayed so far off the right path that extreme measures were required to set things right. Only the extremely horrific death that Jesus suffered on the cross and the final battle he fought with death could fulfill our need for grace. We cannot repay Him for this gift, but we can pay it forward. We can bring others to know the boundless grace of our Savior by giving them a taste of the feast we enjoy. 

 

Saturday, March 31, 2012

Apples and Bananas

In a way it's a bit dishonest to say that I haven't had time to write until now. Truthfully I've had a bit more time in my schedule this week. However, I've been spending a lot of time on Facebook. Some people may say I'm creepy, but I genuinely love to know about people's lives, and this is an exciting time of year. People are talking about their Spring Break adventures, sharing frustration about school and anticipation for summer, and posting pictures of Spring Dances. I'm such a girl, I really love seeing it all. Perfectly harmless interest, right? Well... sometimes. On days like today my time on Facebook is less than healthy. I've been spending time looking at my recent pictures and postings, and comparing them to others. For someone like me who often suffers depression, comparison is a toxic thing. I can always find someone else to envy. I can always find a reason to call myself boring or ugly. What a terrible attitude to indulge! Each person is different, and each person is uniquely beautiful. Psalm 139:14 is often used, but it's worth hearing again and again - "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."
Each of us is made carefully by God, as one of his prized creations. It seems natural to look at nature - landscapes, animals, plants - and praise God for the beauty he creates. We should have the same praise for ourselves. Not one hair on your nose, or scar on your knee, or wart on your foot is a mistake. Yes, our bodies are marred by sin. But God works in all situations, and He has worked beautiful things for you, inside and out.
One thing I'm guilty of is using the phrase "If only..." when comparing myself to others. "If only I had her eye color, I'd look great." "If my hair was just that easy to style, I'd never have to worry about it." I even envy personalities, saying, "If only I could be as comfortable around people as they are, I'd have a much better opinion of myself." The problem is, these things don't fit into the unique scheme of our lives. Who can say how different hair would change my life? The one thing I can say is that God meant for me to look and act exactly as I do, and no minute change is going to make me suddenly happier. The key to beauty isn't a certain look. It's a certain attitude. It's truly believing that there are great plans laid out for your life, and that you will fit into them perfectly, just the way you are. 

 

Monday, March 12, 2012

Do it with purpose.

"If my boss thinks I work hard, it doesn't matter what I actually do."

"Everyone gets a pay raise, why should I work harder than anyone else?"

"I'm tired and I have better things to do. I need to take care of myself first."

These and many others are excuses that I've used at work, and I'm sure you have too. When we first begin a job we often start out on the right foot, wanting to impress our supervisor and set ourselves up above the rest. But it usually doesn't take long before we've figured out how to cut corners and put forth as little effort as possible. It's human nature to look out for self before serving others. Maybe it's even hard to look at your job as a service to others. In reality though, nearly every job, no matter how "mundane", is one that serves people in some way. Making food, keeping a store in order, sitting at a welcome desk - all these and more make life easier for others.

Hmmm... Service to others... This is starting to sound like a Christian issue. Truthfully, it is. God says numerous times in the Bible that we should put forth our best effort in all the work we do. His will for us is almost painfully clear in Colossians 3:23-24:
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving."

When I read this, I felt ashamed. In both academics and employment, I'm guilty of giving partial effort because it seems to not matter. In my pride, I put myself first, claiming that it's better for my health and sanity to "take it easy". It's important to remember that every earthly task placed in front of us is a chance to glorify God. He gives us the ability to carry out our calling, and He deserves the credit when we succeed. When we give our best effort it is a testimony to the blessings God has given us, and a witness to those we are serving with love and joy.