30 Days of Bite-Sized Faith: Eight

"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express." (Romans 8:26)

Last night, for the third time this week, I was awake into the wee hours of the morning. I wish I could tell you that I was reading an exciting book or fully absorbed in a craft project, but I can't. I was just hurting. I was filled with the hurting and restlessness that often makes me lose sleep, and the worst part about these feelings is that I have absolutely no idea how to satisfy them. Many times in those terrifying and exhausting nights I lay aching from the fact that I cannot see a solution. Some things just have to hurt. Sometimes I cannot see around the bend. All I can do is pray.

But when I don't know what I want, how can I pray? It's hard to ask for relief when you have nothing to ask for besides relief. I want to tell God my troubles and ask for what I want, but I don't know what I want and some of my troubles are too deep for words. For these very reasons, the verse I've put up today is one of my very favorite verses in the Bible. It reminds us that God knows us inside and out. He sees every corner of our hearts, even the ones we hide from everyone else, and even the ones we try to hide from Him. So even when I couldn't possibly begin to explain the hurt to anyone else, I don't need to explain it to God.

I remember watching Anne of Green Gables as a child, and laughing when Anne prays for the first time. Anne explains to Marilla that she has never prayed, and she always imagined that if she were going to, she would stand out in a vast field and "just feel a prayer". Marilla, in her best no-nonsense voice, informs Anne that she must say a bedtime prayer, and in response Anne speaks a prayer that sounds very much like a business letter. For all the good intentions of Marilla, I think Anne had a point. Sometimes we don't need to say it all out loud. It is okay to feel a prayer, and sometimes it is necessary. The God of our salvation, who knows our heart and loves us immeasurably, hears even the requests we cannot find the words for. He delights in our conversations, even if they don't seem much like conversations to us.

Remember that God hears the prayers we do not even speak, and works for our good even when we can't imagine what good can be done.